resting in the Everlasting Arms

I would have never guessed that I’d be back on the campus of Southern Seminary. But here I am, almost four full months into my new job as a full-time secretary. Not to say that I don’t love Southern, because I do. This was my home for three and a half years and even after I graduated, I never felt like I left the Southern community. It will always probably feel that way.

Now, even though I never would have chose this for myself, I can see the Lord’s great wisdom in bringing me here. I know without a shadow of a doubt that the Lord brought me to this job; that He has me exactly where He wants me. I think He has yet to disclose His full purpose(s), but He has been showing and teaching me so much already. He has brought me here to rest. Now, I know that is a strange thing to say because it is a job (and I am working, by the way :), but in the midst of all the burdens of life and ministry, this job has been a place of restoration. One of my office responsibilities is to transcribe Dr. Mohler’s sermons, lectures, interviews and Sunday School lessons. So basically I am getting paid to listen to God’s Word. :) The Lord is using these messages to heal the wounds of last year, to continue His refining work and to increase my trust in Him. I am always amazed at the fact that whatever I am assigned to transcribe, it is always what I need to hear. The Lord knows what He is doing.

The lessons this week have been especially pointed. I transcribed audio from both 1 Peter 5 and Hebrews 12:25-29. Both of them reminding me of what the Lord is presently doing in my life. From 1 Peter 5 sermon, the Lord reminded me that He is sovereignly working behind the scenes to accomplish His good purposes in my life, which will come about at just the right time. He also convicted me of my lack of faith. Sometime in these last few months, I stopped believing that the Lord was working for my good. I questioned His willingness to do good to me and wondered if He cared at all.

The Hebrews passage describes the shaking power and consuming fire of God. The Lord has done a lot of shaking in my life. Many people and things that used to be a part of my life no longer are. They didn’t survive the shaking. But not only that, but the Lord has been shaking my faith so that what remains is pure gold (Job 23:10).

Then there’s chapel. Yes, I actually get paid to go to chapel (which is sadly over now until the fall semester). The sermons and worship songs have met me where I am each Tuesday and Thursday. The Lord is very gracious is dealing with me this way.

Besides these things, the Lord is teaching me to submit better to authority and procedure, to be content where He has me and to deepen my understanding of serving others. All of this, I believe, is further preparation for the future. Plus, He is blessing me with some new and great friends. :)

We three secretaries - Rachel, Rachel & Cami

 
Below is a verse that, as I have mentioned before, the Lord gave to my friend Jodi to pray for me during one of my darkest times last year. The Lord has begun binding up and healing the wounds He inflicted last year and He is using this job as one of the means to do it. Not that the tearing is over; He just brings healing in between those seasons. He knows how much we can endure (Psalm 103:14).

    “Come, let us return to the LORD;
        for he has torn us, that he may heal us;
        he has struck us down, and he will bind us up.
    After two days he will revive us;
        on the third day he will raise us up,
        that we may live before him.
   Let us know; let us press on to know the LORD;
        his going out is sure as the dawn;
    he will come to us as the showers,
        as the spring rains that water the earth.” Hosea 6:1-3

The latter part of this passage exhorts us to press on to the know the Lord. And that is what I must do. In the midst of everything that feels unclear in my life, I must press on to know the Lord. He knows the future and is perfectly satisfied with it. Furthermore, Jesus Christ has me where He wants me now and is perfectly satisfied with it. He is about to do something big. I can sense it. In the meantime, however, I must press on to know the Lord. He wants to give me Himself (!) and He wants me to give Him myself as well. He desires this more than any sacrifice I can give Him (Hosea 6:6). He deserves nothing less.