His Grace is Sufficient

The Lord has been showing me lately how much I am dependent on His grace and how He is always sovereignly at work even when I fail to realize it. My family has been hit hard recently with various trials, but each portray the sovereign  hand of my most loving and gracious Savior, Jesus Christ.

On such event occurred last Sunday when the brakes went out on my car (not related to the wreck) while my mom was driving. It just so "happened," however, that they went out at the exact moment my mom put my car in park in front of our house. Do you see the grace of Christ in that? One moment longer in town and she would not have been so fortunate, but He orchestrated events in such a way that both she and my sister arrived safely home. What protection! What grace!

My dad told me of a guy who said, "I ask for God's favor and help when going into a situation and then proceed as if it all depended on me." How foolish. Who gave him his breath, his abilities, his resources? What does he have that didn't come from God? Can this man forsee the future or know the wisest decision in every situation? No. He (and we) must depend upon God every step of the way. For "in Him, we live and move and have our being."

Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need (Hebrews 4:16).

Week One in the States

I have been home for a little over a week now. My first experience of "culture shock" came in the Newark airport restroom. I forgot that automatic flushing toilets existed and was quite startled when I encountered one. :) For the most part, this past week has been a pretty rough one spiritually and emotionally as I adjust to an entirely different pace of life and struggle to find a nice balance between my life overseas and my life here. To add to this, a good friend and mentor passed away a few days after I returned. I attended a memorial service yesterday where we celebrated his life. After the service, I rear-ended someone. The people I hit and their vehicle (a truck) are fine, but my car received some damage. A fitting end to what had been a rough week...

It hasn't been all bad though. I have been able to see lots of familiar faces at church and a family reunion. Plus my family took me to Scoops - the new frozen custard joint in town - on my first day back. The next day Kristi and I went to Fredericktown's new (and very nice) McDonald's to read God's Word. I have been on lots of walks, enjoying the beautiful countryside of the States. I also watched the final season of LOST. It was as crazy and mind-bending as ever, but I thoroughly enjoyed it...and it provided a nice escape from reality. This morning I went to the much dreaded dentist office. Praise be to God that my gums held their own during my seven month hiatus (I usually go every three months).

Home is Where God's Will Is

So I am on my way to debriefing, hanging out in the airport waiting for my next flight. John Denver's Leaving on a Jet Plane has been playing in the background of my mine all morning, and the lyrics mean more now than they ever did. This part of the world has been my home for the last six months and I am sad to leave it. I have learned, however, over the last several years to make wherever I am my home, knowing that it is only temporary. The Bible tells us believers that this world is not our home (Hebrews 13:14). This life is only temporary and our true home awaits us in heaven with God. Christ Himself has gone before us to prepare a place for us there (John 14:2-3). So often we forget this truth. We strive to settle down and live a comfortable, self-sufficient life - the American Dream. God has not called us to settle, though. His command is to GO - to always be ready to to follow Him whenever and to wherever He calls. In the book of Genesis, God commanded the people to spread out over the earth and multiply. He wanted (and still wants) to fill the earth with worshipers of Himself. The people, however, didn't listen. They did the opposite of what God commanded, by coming together to make a name for themselves. They wanted to be independent of God, self-reliant, safe and comfortable. Isn't that what the American Dream is? God, however, has called us to something better - His Dream. His plan is for all people groups to know Him, their Creator; for them to hear about the saving work of Jesus Christ, their Savior; to save them from an eternity separated from Him in hell; and to give them everlasting joy by giving them the gift of Himself. The plan of God will not be thwarted. He will accomplish it with or without us, but He does invite us to join Him. He has given us two choices: we can choose our own path apart from Christ (which ends in destruction) or we can choose the path God shows us which gives us life...life to the full (John 10:10). So, I urge you with the words of Louie Giglio, "pack up the American Dream and exchange it for a part in God's global story" - the story of His mind-bending plan of rescuing the nations from sin and death by spreading the Good News of Jesus Christ so that all may know Him.

Days Go By...

Sunday is my last day in this country - with the girls, with my newfound friends and family...where did the time go? I have been avoiding thinking about leaving, but I can't anymore. I have to think about how I am going to spend my last few days here, who I am going to see, saying goodbye, packing... I haven't even left yet and I am so ready ready to return. Don't get me wrong, I am excited about seeing those I love and care about in the States, but I dread the thought of leaving everyone here. I know, however, that going back to America is God's will and I completely trust Him.

While there isn't much I miss about the States, living here has made me appreciate a few things about my native country that I used to take for granted:
1. order and structure
2. efficiency
3. (enforced) traffic laws
4. sidewalks
5. politeness (thank you, please, etc)
No culture, of course, is perfect. There are some things I absolutely hate about this culture, but then there are things I really love. Much of it, I am really going to miss. Especially the 36 smiling faces I got used to seeing almost every day:

Freedom in Restrictions

I know that sounds like an oxymoron, but it is true. If we did not have rules, laws and restrictions to abide by, our freedom would be limited. I was reading in a book about this very point. The reason freeways are free is because we have traffic laws. These laws give us the ability to quickly and efficiently get where we need to go. When people do not abide by the rules, accidents and jams happen and chaos ensues. I see this play out in the driving here. This country has traffic laws (I am pretty sure), but no one follows them because they are not enforced. As a result, people can drive anywhere and however they want. Mix this with our sinful human nature ("me first" attitude) and you get very chaotic and awful driving conditions. There are no lanes, so people just drive where they please, dodging and cutting from one side of the road to another. Stop lights aren't obeyed, so people cut each other off to get where they want to go. The bigger your vehicle is, the more leverage and "freedom" you have. This "freedom" in driving, reduces speed because you are always having to dodge other vehicles and other pedestrians. Therefore, traveling is not quick and definitely not efficient.

God's Law works in the same way. God gives us rules to obey and commands to follow. When we heed His Word, blessings ensue and we have more freedom to live the life He intended. On the other hand, if we disobey His Word and choose to do our own thing, we fulfill our selfish ambition and desires, but then we are a slave to whatever consequences that entails.

Do you not know that if you present yourselves to anyone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one whom you obey, either of sin, which leads to death, or of obedience, which leads to righteousness? Romans 6:16

Christ Jesus has set us (who follow Him) free from the Law through His death and resurrection. By doing so, He allows and empowers us to have a relationship with our Creator God and to live in a away that both satisfies Him and our God-given moral consciences.

For the law of the Spirit of life has set you1 free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death. Romans 8:2

Diminishing Time and a Divided Heart

Yesterday, I completed my final visa run. My time here is winding down faster than I would like to admit. This past week, though, has been rather tiring and discouraging. My visa run, for once, came as a welcome change. My favorite thing about having to leave the country once a month is that it gives me an excellent opportunity to spend time completely alone with Jesus [of course, flying over the Himalayas isn't that bad either :)].

While I was reading a book recently, I came across this quote by Jim Elliot:

Wherever you are, be all there. Live life to the hilt every situation you believe to be the will of God.

These words really stood out to me. Partly because I see them playing out in my own life and partly because I see them not playing out in the lives of others who have recently come here. I believe without a shadow of a doubt that God brought me to serve Him here and, as a result, I have poured all of myself into this place. My fear, however, is that not all of me will return to America. God is preparing my heart to go back to the States (for which I am very thankful) and I know that it is His will for me to do so, but the work He has called me to here and the relationships I have built have captured my heart in a way I cannot explain. But as they always say, "all good things must come to an end," and such is the case for my time here in South Asia. I have two weeks left in this country and three weeks in this region of the world. Pray that I finish well.

But I do not account my life of any value nor as precious to myself, if only I may finish my course and the ministry that I received from the Lord Jesus, to testify to the gospel of the grace of God. Acts 20:24

Sea World, Safari, Shopping, a Story & a Social Network

These past few weeks have been filled with lots activities and ministry opportunities. Last Thursday, we took the girls to Sea World (a water park). They had so much fun. There were 25 girls who were eligible to go and 16 adults. Each adult was responsible for at least two girls. My two girls were so well-behaved! We had a lot of fun together. I would take them home if I could...

I, of course, took my camera with me. I wrapped it in Saran Wrap and put it in a Ziploc bag to keep it dry. I took quite a few pictures before my precautions fell through. It stopped working temporarily, but, thankfully, it started working again later. I let it sit in a bowl of rice overnight to soak up any remaining moisture and now it is as good as new. :)

Last weekend, I went out of town to visit a safari. My roommates and I planned on riding elephants, but, to our disappointment, there were no elephants there to ride. The monkeys got out of the cages though (not the one below)! One came pretty close to me and I am pretty sure he would have jumped on me if I hadn't moved. Some of them chased and tried to attack innocent bystanders. It was quite the experience...

Shopping is not usually an activity I enjoy in America, but here it is different. I really didn't think I would like bartering with the salesmen, but I do. I think it is because I like to win...or I am just stubborn and won't give in to their prices. ;) Since I am a foreigner, they think they can sale me things at a much higher price, but I know better. They also liked to tell me that the price is fixed, but I tell them there is no such thing as a fixed price in this country. Today, I bought two pairs of earrings. The salesguys wanted around 100 or so for them, but I talked them down to 30 and 40 each (about 50 cents in US currency). If only I could barter like this in the States...

I have been reading a Christian fantasy trilogy by Ted Dekker (The Circle Trilogy). I am currently reading the third book in the series called White. I usually do not read fiction, but my sister recommended it and I thought it would be a good way to wind down instead of reading deep, theological books that require a lot of concentration. I am amazed, however, at how JC is using these books to make me love the Gospel even more; to grow my faith; and to teach me more about the Lord I serve and love so much. Dekker's imagery in describing pure worship, the fall, the trinity, God's love, Christ's sacrifice, the darkness of sin and the love of Christ for His Bride, the Church, has help me love and see and appreciate and understand the Gospel in a whole new way. I have set the book aside for now to focus on language learning, stuff for the Center and discipleship stuff, but I cannot wait to pick it up again.

So I found out today that this country has blocked Facebook as of today. Apparently there was some anti-M*hammed stuff posted, which they were not too pleased with. I am interested to see how all this plays out...