Striving for the Ideal

As I have mentioned before, I had been reading through the book of Proverbs in my quiet time. My constant desire and prayer of late is for the Lord to grow me in wisdom. He promises to give it generously to those who ask (James 1:5). At the end of Proverbs, there is a section that describes the ideal woman of God. On Sunday mornings, I have been digging deeper into certain passages and, this morning, I studied Proverbs 31:10-31 more in depth. It is fitting that this passage would end the book because, as the ESV study notes suggest, it brings together the many themes of Proverbs and demonstrates that the book of Proverbs is for all people - both male and female.

This ideal woman is called excellent both at the beginning and end of the passage (v. 10, 29). She is a hard-worker (v. 13-16, 18-19, 27), she is wise (v. 16, 18, 26), she cares for the poor (v. 20), she is diligent (v. 18, 27), she is industrious (v. 16, 22, 24), she is strong (v. 17, 25), she is kind (v. 26), she is selfless (v. 12, 15, 20-21) and she fears the Lord (v. 30). All of these characteristics are described throughout the book of Proverbs as belonging to those who are wise (20:13; 31:9). The fact that this woman fears the Lord is the foundation for all these other traits - everything good about her flows from her trust in the Lord. What I found most striking as I looked up the cross-references for these verses were the ones for verse 22:

She makes bed coverings for herself;
her clothing is fine linen and purple.

This was one of the verses linked to "fine linen":

it was granted her [the Bride of Christ, which is His Church] to clothe herself
with fine linen, bright and pure -
for the fine linen is the righteous deeds of the saints. Revelation 19:8

I was caught of guard by this connection. This woman was clothed in fine linen and the verse in Revelation says that the fine linen is the "righteous deeds of the saints." This clothing was given to her (Revelation 19:8 says it was "granted"). She is righteous and walked wisely because she knew the Lord (31:30). He made her righteous and her righteousness was displayed through her wisdom and loving acts. The Lord had clothed her and the same can be said for those of us who are in Christ. God made Christ to be sin even though He was sinless so that we might become righteous in His sight (2 Corinthians 5:21). We do not deserve it or cannot earn it. It is given to us because of the great grace and love of God. The only difference between this woman and the women that Proverbs warns about is grace (Proverbs 2:16-19, 19:13, 21:19, 25:24, 27:15). The only difference between someone that believes in Christ and someone who rejects Him is grace (Ephesians 2:8).

This takes me to today's sermon from Rolling Fields: The Lord Our Righteousness. The righteousness of God affects our every day lives - just like it did for the Proverbs 31 woman. Whether at home or in public or in ministry, she acted wisely and rightly, and so it should be with us. Jesus Christ is our righteousness and everything good that we do and everything good that we are stems from what He did for us on the cross. We have been clothed with His perfection. When God sees us, He sees Christ. We are hidden with Christ in God (Colossians 3:3), so much so that we are a new creation (2 Corinthians 5:17; Ephesians 4:24; Colossians 3:10). So even though living the Christian life is based on the past, historic event of Christ's life, death, burial and resurrection and is set on the hope of His future return, we are to live a life pleasing to Him in the here and now (Colossians 1:10).

For to this end we toil and strive, because we have our hope set on the living God, who is the Savior of all people, especially those who believe. 1 Timothy 4:10

The Promise of Spring

Can you be "in love" with weather? Because I think I am. I am so excited for spring that I can hardly stand it. Today, I got off work early and went to one of my favorite places in Louisville - Cherokee Park. It's like a little hint of the country in the city. I was probably a little over zealous to go there since it's still a little chilly (I mean, it is still February), but I was itching to spend time with the Lord Jesus outside. I spent about 45 minutes there until the cool wind got to me. I then headed to Southern's campus (another of my favorite places) to continue reading until Kristi got out of class. I am reading a book called Integrity by Henry Cloud. It has been an enlightening and challenging read and it is really expanding my view of the word integrity. 

Whoever walks in integrity, walks securely,
but he who makes his ways crooked will be found out. Proverbs 10:9

I read today in Dr. Mohler's blog that Borders filed for bankruptcy yesterday and that they are closing 200 stores. I find this news very disheartening. I thoroughly enjoy reading and very much enjoy spending time in bookstores. I would place the Borders on 4th Street downtown as another one of my favorite places to hang out in Louisville. I fear what this means for the future of books in general. Call me old-fashioned, but I am not yet used to the idea - nor do I like the idea - of an electronic book. There is just something about holding a physical book with real pages that adds to the experience of reading.

In my quiet time in the morning, I have been reading through the book of Proverbs. I recently came across this verse:

for by wise guidance you can wage your war,and in the abundance of counselors there is victory. Proverbs 24:6

As I have mentioned several times before, the Lord is teaching me a lot about wisdom - namely, just how limited mine is. Over the past several months, I have had different things come up that required me to diligently search God's Word, seek the Lord in prayer and pursue wise counsel from others. The Lord is so gracious in providing me with (and making me aware of) the "counselors" He has placed in my life. There is a core group of six or seven people that God has used to speak His truth into my life and to steer me on the right path. I am so thankful for these people. They are an incredible blessing in my life and have helped me through some difficult decisions and choices. 

Through all this, the Lord has taught me how to be more open, more trusting, more humble and less independent. It has been a growing experience to say the least, but I am learning to share my burdens with others and express what I think and feel (when appropriate, of course). The wisdom, grace and kindness of the Lord that He so willingly lavishes on His children is so amazing.

But God being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ - by grace you have been saved - and raised us up with Him and seated us with Him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages He might show the immeasurable riches of His grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. Ephesians 2:4-7

The Sun is Shining and There is Hope for Me Again

This title is from another Third Day song called The Sun is Shining and it perfectly describes the past month and half or so of my life. I half been walking around in a sort of darkness with a downcast spirit, crying out to the Lord and waiting for Him to answer and guide me. My trip to Missouri last weekend was like a break from my life here in Louisville. I was able to briefly escape the spiritual warfare, responsibilities and decisions that were weighing heavily upon me. The Lord was so gracious to give me such relief in this valley as He gave me rest and times of refreshing in His Word. When I returned to Louisville, however, it was all waiting for me. For the first few days of the week, I faced discouragement from the moment I opened my eyes and every day felt like a trial. Jesus Christ is abundantly gracious, however, and met me where I was. I know that phrase is used a lot and I don't want to sound cliche, but it's true. He by His Holy Spirit would bring sermons, songs and verses to my mind and when I listened to them, they were exactly what I needed to hear. The sermons were from MH's Believe series. Through them God showed me that I wasn't expecting the best, I wasn't placing my faith in Him and I wasn't fully trusting Him. I was living as if Romans 8:28 were not true and if I was in control. In essence, I had shifted my focus off of my Maker and Savior and placed it on other things. In my quiet time with the Lord, I have been reading through Psalms and Proverbs. Each morning and evening, the Scriptures I read spoke directly to my circumstances and reminded me of the hope I had in Christ. Even the verses at the bottom of my journal pages (and I have been journaling A LOT lately) were exactly what I needed. The Lord used these various things to show me my sin, call me back to Him and bring me out of my distress. He was actively teaching me, answering me and holding on to me. This is GRACE. On Wednesday, He was faithful to answer my prayer to give me a verse (Lamentations 3:21-24) to wake up with to combat the discouragement of the devil. He has renewed my hope, faith and strength and lifted me up out of the darkness. Plus...the sun is shining. :)

Today, I have been basking in the overflow of God's grace and I have been overjoyed with His goodness and faithfulness. The lessons from God these past few weeks have been many and hard, but the Lord's grace is more than sufficient to meet my every need. At Rolling Fields, we have been going through the many names of God (ways He has revealed Himself and that describe His character). Each sermon has been so applicable and I have been hanging on to every word. God truly is all that I will ever need. This morning we focused on how God is the God who sanctifies us. The focus was primarily on the Sabbath Day and how that relates to us now. The really cool thing is that this morning, while I was getting ready for church, I was thinking about how I really wanted to clean my apartment. Sunday, however, is my only day off and I wasn't sure if I should clean on my "Sabbath" or not. I wanted to honor the Lord's command to keep a day set apart for Him, but I also didn't want to fall into legalism. This is exactly what the sermon was about. As with all things, it has to do with the heart. God has us set aside a day to focus on Him because we are so apt to forget Him in all our activities and busyness. Christ, however, fulfilled the Law for us and has freed us from the demands of the Law. So after hearing this sermon and talking to the preacher, I decided that it was okay for me to clean. I enjoy cleaning for the most part anyway and I did so while listening to music so that I could praise God while I scrubbed. It was awesome.

Also today, I decided to order a new computer. Because I have all my programs from my last one, I could buy a decent base computer at a good price (especially since there was a sale this weekend). I tried to talk Dell into giving me free shipping (I was $16 short of the minimum purchase), but to no avail. :) With the funds that my boss has collected for me, I will only spend about $200 out of pocket and I will have a better computer than what I had before. The Lord continues to bless. :)

I will end with this passage of Scripture that pretty much describes my life these past few weeks. It speaks of a man that went through hard times and the discipline of the Lord and how the Lord restored his hope. The Lord has done the same for me:

Lamentations 3:1-9, 16-27, 31-33 

I am the man who has seen affliction
under the rod of his wrath;
  he has driven and brought me
into darkness without any light;
  surely against me he turns his hand
again and again the whole day long.

He has made my flesh and my skin waste away;
he has broken my bones;
  he has besieged and enveloped me
with bitterness and tribulation;
  he has made me dwell in darkness
like the dead of long ago.

He has walled me about so that I cannot escape;
he has made my chains heavy;
  though I call and cry for help,
he shuts out my prayer;
  he has blocked my ways with blocks of stones;
he has made my paths crooked.

He has made my teeth grind on gravel,
and made me cower in ashes;
  my soul is bereft of peace;
I have forgotten what happiness is;
  so I say, “My endurance has perished;
so has my hope from the LORD.”

Remember my affliction and my wanderings,
the wormwood and the gall!
  My soul continually remembers it
and is bowed down within me.
        BUT this I call to mind,
and therefore I have hope:

The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases;
his mercies never come to an end;
  they are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
  “The LORD is my portion,” says my soul,
“therefore I will hope in him.”

The LORD is good to those who wait for him,
to the soul who seeks him.
  It is good that one should wait quietly
for the salvation of the LORD.
  It is good for a man that he bear
the yoke in his youth.

For the Lord will not
cast off forever,
  but, though he cause grief, he will have compassion
according to the abundance of his steadfast love;
  for he does not willingly afflict
or grieve the children of men.

Long Lessons During the Long Winter

This morning I woke up to a beautiful layer of snow. I vaguely remember there being a prediction of a few inches, but I usually do not put too much stock into what the weathermen say. To my surprise, however, we received around five inches. It was a spectacular sight. Miles and miles of untrodded on white snow and crystalized trees. Have I mentioned how much I love the countryside?

I have spent the majority of the day working on my parents' computers. My dad and I took a field trip to McDonald's for lunch and to take advantage of their free Wi-Fi. Our phone line and Internet have been down during the day due to the ice and snow...but for some reason it works okay at night. Anyway, Dad wanted me to file his taxes for him. I would rather teach my parents how to do it themselves (empower rather than enable), but they weren't too interested, so Dad sat there while I e-filed. Since our return from town, I have been updating the desktop and fixing my mom's laptop. Some how she got a virus. I have already found and deleted over 200 infected files. There are still a few more lingering, and I am working on them right now. I really should start charging for my services. I hear techs make big bucks. ;)

I received the letter I wrote to myself from one of my last days in South Asia. It was part of the debriefing process. The letter was both encouraging and challenging. Encouraging in the fact that the Lord has allowed me to fulfill some of my plans and commitments and it was challenging because there are some things I haven't been so faithful about or that I completely forgot about.  "Remember that you were made for overseas," I wrote to myself. I haven't forgotten and my heart rings with these words.

The first sermon I heard this year at Sojourn Community Church has proven to be God's teaching theme for me so far this year. It was called "Wisdom and Planning" from Proverbs 16, which focuses on making plans and submitting them unto the Lord. What freedom we have from Christ to make plans and decisions! I am learning so much about this process and what it means to seek God's wisdom and guidance above all else. He gives us the principles and guidelines to follow and leads us by His Spirit. What I am learning is that each decision requires seeking the Lord's direction (He gives us everything we need in His Word), committing a decision to Him and then stepping out in faith. There is an element of faith and uncertainty involved, but that is what makes us trust the Lord and lean wholly on Him. It is resting is the fact that God is working for our good (Romans 8:28). I think this ties into a John Piper sermon I listened to with my sister on the way to Fredericktown. He talked about how the Lord gives us strength through the gospel and explained how that looked for both women and men. For women, he cited 1 Peter 3:5-6 and Proverbs 31:25, which describes a woman of God that does not fear the future but wholly trusts in God.

For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.

Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come. 

Trust. These verses and the verses on planning and wisdom all have to do with trusting Jesus Christ with all your heart (Proverbs 3:5-6). He promises over and over to give wisdom to those who ask and to lead them on the right path (Psalm 25:5, 32:8, 112:6-7; Proverbs 2:1-11; Isaiah 30:21; James 1). He tells us not to worry about the future because He knows our needs and will provide for us (Matthew 6). As I read through Scripture, the Lord has sovereignly directed my reading towards passages that are concentrated in these areas. I have no doubt that He will continually to lead and guide me so that I can fulfill the purpose He has for me (Acts 13:36).

Well, time to watch Napolean Dynamite with the fam...

Vice vs. Virtue

As you can probably tell from the tone and content of my last few posts, I have been going through a tough time. The enemy has been hard at work to discourage me and trip me up. God is in control, however, and He never wastes circumstances. He has His refiner's tool out, chipping away areas of my life that are not pleasing to Him or that need improvement. It has been a humbling experience to say the least.

During this time, I have come to realize there are some characteristics that God has embedded into my personality that are both virtues and vices. Sometimes our strengths can also be our weaknesses. For instance, I am both reserved/introverted and independent. In and of themselves there is nothing wrong with these two traits, but there are times when they work against me. My reserved nature helps keep me from sticking my foot in my mouth...it makes me more apt to think before speaking. On the other hand, it impedes the growth of relationships because I am hard to get to know and can come off as passive or indifferent. My independence also works in this way - it helps me to follow the Lord wherever He may call, but it also tempts me to do things in my own strength. The Lord is ever-so gracious, though, and never leaves us where we are. For this, I am so thankful. Over these past few weeks, He has been reminding me through various trials and situations that He is in control, that I need to trust Him above all else and that His plan is far better than mine. He has called me to ministries that will force me to be less reserved and He wants me to be more open in my relationships. He is breaking my independence by forcing me to rely on and wait on Him in most areas of my life. He has given me things and now He is taking them away so that I will trust Him and not the gifts that He has given. Hard lessons, no doubt, but oh what sweet fruit they will produce!

But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope: The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; His mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. "The Lord is my portion," says my soul, "therefore I will hope in Him." Lamentations 3:21-24