An Ethical Dilemma

I have known about and have been anticipating the infamous final for my Christian Ethics class since I registered for the course. My professor posted it on his blog last Friday and it is a doozy. We are allowed to use any resource that we would normally have access to in real-life ministry with one exception: we cannot talk to the people in our class. So, I have started doing some research, thinking through God's Kingdom purposes for each situation and plan on calling a few people for some insight...but I am interested to know what YOU think. Click here to read the lengthy ethical scenario.
Comments are more than welcomed (unless, of course, you are in my class!). :)

No More Classes, No More Books...

Today was my last day of classes. Only 2 finals separate me from graduation. I am so excited to be free from having to worry about homework!

One of the classes I took this semester was called Community Development and Disaster Relief. In it, all my experience and coursework in business management, human services and international miss. seemed to converge, which made it a fitting end to my educational career. Yesterday, I completed a community development strategy paper that built upon the work I did earlier this year in a South Asian center for slum girls. It was probably one of the most rewarding (and fun) papers I have ever written. It had little to do with research and much to do with dreaming. :) It was supposed to be a minimum of ten pages...I wound up writing 18 (!). I am usually a person of few/concise words who has trouble meeting the minimum page requirement, so this way-over-the-minimum paper was the first for me. The Lord has been gradually showing me the specifics of His call to serve Him overseas and I believe community development will play a big part of it. I am so excited to see what He has in store! Please pray for me as I go through this time of transition.

Wisdom in the Darkness

Sometimes the Lord brings us into situations that are difficult to discern and that reveal our limited wisdom. Such was the case for me this past week. The Lord is gracious, though, and doesn't leave His children without direction. Even though His Word does not always address our specific situations, He does give us principles and truths from His Word that will help us make the right decision in accordance with His will - one that honors Him and loves others. As I searched through various passages that dealt with wisdom, discernment, pleasing the Lord, trusting the Lord and considering myself rightly (i.e. Psalm 3:5-6; Psalm 25; Romans 12; Phil 4:7-8), the Lord faithfully led me to a decision that I believe is His will. The tricky thing about following the Lord, though, is that I must seek His will continually. He leads His children for a while down on path then when it forks or that work or such finishes, He leads them down a different path. [This is not to say that God is wishy-washy. The Bible is clear that He never changes (Hebrews 13:8). His ways, however, are not ours and what may look like a change of mind to us are really the unveiling of His purposes that are far beyond what we can know or comprehend.] It is at these forks in the road and times of transition that He grows and strengthens our faith in Him. These times are not usually very pleasant, but when you look back on them, you can see the Lord's great wisdom, grace and sovereignty in bringing you through them. There are so many situations and unknowns right now in my life that remind me of my limited wisdom and my need for Christ. He is my Great Shepherd. Where He leads, I want to follow - no matter where that may be and no matter what the cost.

A neat thing that did happen in the midst of all this is how the Lord prepared me and my sister both for circumstances happening in each other's lives before we talked to each other. I sent her a vague prayer request via email and she sensed what it was about (and she was right). She left me a voice mail during our few days of phone tag that told me she wanted to tell me about something that had happened. When I heard this, I had "a feeling" of what she was going to tell me (and I was right). How cool is it that the Lord prepared us both in advance to hear the information we were about to receive from one another?

Switching gears: I am becoming increasing uncomfortable with being out by myself at night. I am not sure if this stems from my time in South Asia or if I am just growing out of my small-town-girl ignorance. Either way, I have become more aware of my surroundings as well as my own vulnerability as a female. The other night I broke my rule of not going to Wal-Mart after dark to pick up something. Now, the Wal-Mart I live by is down-right shady. Men seem to loiter there for no apparent reason. I usually try to avoid eye contact by looking at the ground and walk as quickly as I can to and from my car. The stares I receive there are equivalent to the stare-a-hole through you ones I received in South Asia (extremely creepy and uncomfortable). During this last trip to Wal-Mart (and I do mean last), I barely made it through the entrance when a man thought he'd take the opportunity to hit on me. [Eye roll.] I mean, can't a girl buy toilet paper in peace? [I would like to note that my trip ended on a higher note as I got to converse with the cashier who was from Nepal.]

Today, I got to spend the afternoon doing one of my favorite hobbies - photography. A friend of mine from church asked me to take pictures of her beautiful family to use for her Christmas cards. To top it off, my boss let me use her awesome Nikon D60 (thanks Michele!). These are some of my favorites:



The Question

I graduate from Southern one month from today. It's crazy to think about, but it's true. This fact has prompted the inevitable question, "What are you going to do next?" First, I am going to read at my leisure and for the sheer pleasure of reading in and of itself. Then, maybe I will write all those blog posts I have swimming around in my head...

The real answer to the question is that I simply don't know. The Lord has not been pleased thus far to reveal to me the next step. I know that I ultimately want to serve the Lord overseas among the poor - telling them about the hope that is found solely in Jesus Christ. Before that happens, though, I need to take care of these pesky student loans. Whether that means staying where I am at Papers Unique or taking up a new job somewhere else, I don't know. I have know doubt that the Lord will reveal to me in His perfect timing what's next. I am fairly confident, though, that I am to remain in Louisville and I am for certain I am to minister to people here on behalf of Christ. Now that school is almost out of the way, I can devote more of my time to building relationships and to ministry.

The end of my time at Southern has proven to be bittersweet. I am more than ready to kiss homework goodbye, but I love to learn (especially about Jesus) and I will miss the class lectures and chapel services that God has used so much to shape and grow me. Now, most of you know that pursuing a Master's degree was not my favorite idea. I didn't see my need for theological study...I mean, couldn't I just get my theology from my own personal study of the Bible? Through my time here, however, I have learned how much I needed theological correction and direction. I have learned how to study God's Word and have, in the process, discovered God's grand plan that fills it pages from cover to cover. My time here has been nothing but a blessing and has been filled with numerous lessons from the Lord (both in and out of the classroom). Even though the coursework will soon be finished, I know I won't stop learning. I serve a God whose infinite nature will keep me hungry to know more of Him for the rest of my life.

Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are his judgments and how inscrutable his ways!

“For who has known the mind of the Lord,
or who has been his counselor?”
“Or who has given a gift to him
that he might be repaid?”

For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be glory forever. Amen. (Romans 11:33-36)

Across the Midwest

I returned this evening from mine and Katelyn's trek to Oklahoma. We had such a good time and it was a good break away from the routine of every day life. We worshipped the Lord, laughed a lot, teased each other and discussed current events in our lives. The Lord blessed us with beautiful driving weather for which we are very thankful. He also provided (food, coupons, etc) and protected (we were run off the road almost twice by some crazies) in more ways than we probably even realize. We broke up the trip on the way there by stopping by my parents' house for the night but drive the whole way back today. We took a few pit stops along the way to stretch and have a little fun by visiting the Russell Stover Candies store and Cheese Outlet (which provided free samples!) in Lebanon, MO on the way there and stopping by the arch in St. Louis on the way back. It was Katelyn's first time in St. Louis, so I played, as she likes to say, "tour guide Barbie."

The wedding was the most unique and by far the most fun and laid back that I have attended. It was South Asian in fashion but American in ceremony, which means lots of color and lights, saris and pujabis with a thoroughly Christian focus. Katelyn and I were involved behind the scenes in a number of ways...including doing the bride's mehindi (henna). I even made up a song for the bride in Bangla while I was waiting in the reception line. She appreciated it. :)

The End is in Sight!

It's amazing the difference one week can make. Last week, I was overwhelmed with the amount of school work that had to be done and the seemingly little time I had to do it. The Lord was so gracious to give me much motivation and extra time (or maybe just time management) so that I now only have 3 assignments left:
1. Finish reading my last ethics book and write a paper interacting with it
2. Final systematic paper
3. Community development strategy paper
Besides 2 finals, that is it! I feel like so much weight has been lifted from my shoulders. I am so thankful for such a productive week!

I have come to the sad realization that I am going to have to retire my favorite pair of blue jeans. The knees have been patched for a while, but now the material is really starting to thin and holes are developing in other areas. This is sad on two accounts. First, they are so comfortable, which is why I like them so much. Second, I do not like shopping, especially jean shopping. It ranks right up there with sitting in traffic and eating peas. In fact, I don't know which is worse - shopping for jeans or sitting in rush hour. ;) But, the Lord in His grace and provision, just provided me with 2 new pair from my boss. I was lamented the fact that I would have to depart with the before-mentioned beloved pair when she told me she had several new pairs she was looking to get rid off. She gave me four to try on. While they were all big for me, two of them were just a little baggy, nothing a belt couldn't handle (even though they were all almost the same size, which is why I particularly dislike shopping for blue jeans). So now I can delay that dreaded trip to the mall for a little longer. :) Plus there are probably still a few more wearings left in the disintegrating pair mentioned above...

Tomorrow, Katelyn and I are heading out on a road trip to Oklahoma. On the way, we are stopping by F'town to pick up my car (yay!). Our friend and former South Asian roommate is getting married. It will be like a mini - very mini - South Asian reunion. :)

R1, R2 and KG