If last year could be considered my spiritual high, then this year would be my spiritual low. Disappointments, bad news, closed doors and silence from the Lord have been the marks of 2011 so far. Exactly the opposite of 2010. It is the silence that makes it all almost unbearable. The Lord has hidden His working from me so that I cannot perceive it and He has been utterly silent to my cries for guidance. I ask for light, but I am kept in the dark. I know and believe wholeheartedly that Jesus is still in control and that He is still working, which is the truth to which I cling.
Even though the Lord has seemed to shut out my prayers, I know that He hears me. He continues to tell me to wait, to be still and to trust Him. Through His Word, He directs me to passages that exhort me to these things and that tell me why I am going through this wilderness. Deuteronomy 8 is one such passage. In it, God explains to the Israelites why He sent them into the desert wilderness for 40 years. It was in order to humble them, to test them to reveal what was in their hearts and to teach them to feed on and treasure God's Word above all else. The Lord did this to prepare them for the Promised Land. Likewise, I know that this is a time of preparation in my life - preparing me for whatever the Lord Jesus has in store. Pray that I will be found faithful.
Sometimes I want to escape or quit or beg for this season to end, but James 1 reminds me of the joy that awaits trials like these: Christlikeness. I am to count it all joy for God is working in me the image of His Son...and to do that takes a lot of (painful) work as He chisels out more and more of me to reveal more and more of Christ. Also, I noticed for the first time in James 1 the little word let.
And let steadfastness/patience have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. James 1:4The trials themselves are a gift from God that makes us more like His Son. We have to work with Him, though. We have to let the testing of our faith produce steadfastness and we have to let steadfastness have its complete effect. The full effect is that we become more holy like the Savior we serve. We can hinder this, however, when we don't embrace the trials as the gifts from God that they really are.
One of my biggest discoveries this year is that when we ask for more of Christ in and through our lives (and if you know Him and follow Him, you should be asking for this), we are actually asking for our faith to be tested and refined. The psalmists repeatedly cry out for the Lord to test their faith, to search their hearts and to prove their ways (i.e. Psalm 139:23). Until this year, I never realized that they were opening themselves up to God's refining work, to trials and hardships and whatever else God needed to do in and through them to make them more like Himself. We must remember the words of Jesus, "A servant is not above his Master" (Matthew 10:24). The Lord Jesus waited 30 years for God's timing to start His public ministry. He was rejected by many, mocked, betrayed, murdered...should we expect any less? We are not alone in these sufferings, though. Jesus promises to never leave or forsake us (Hebrews 13:5). We are to follow His example to be sure - looking unto the joy of the Reward set before us and forgetting all this is behind - but we do not do it alone. Jesus is with us. He strengthens and sustains us. And He is the Reward.
Looking unto Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. Hebrews 12:2We are not, however, the only ones who wait. The Lord Himself waits to show us grace. He knows the perfect way to achieve His purpose of sanctification in us. Through these light momentary afflictions, He is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison (2 Corinthians 4:17-18).
Therefore the Lord waits to be gracious to you, and therefore He exalts Himself to show mercy to you. For the Lord is a God of justice; blessed are all those who wait for Him. Isaiah 30:18
1 comment:
"to feed on and treasure God's Word above all else."
God continually uses the trials and joys of your blogs to bless me along my own spiritual journey. In fact, I have Livin' Life in Romans 7 added to my favorites list, right between the pages of Dr. James White & R.C. Sproul.
"But you, beloved, building yourselves up in your most holy faith and praying in the Holy Spirit, keep yourselves in the love of God, waiting for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ that leads to eternal life." (Jude 20-21)
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