Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Vice vs. Virtue

As you can probably tell from the tone and content of my last few posts, I have been going through a tough time. The enemy has been hard at work to discourage me and trip me up. God is in control, however, and He never wastes circumstances. He has His refiner's tool out, chipping away areas of my life that are not pleasing to Him or that need improvement. It has been a humbling experience to say the least.

During this time, I have come to realize there are some characteristics that God has embedded into my personality that are both virtues and vices. Sometimes our strengths can also be our weaknesses. For instance, I am both reserved/introverted and independent. In and of themselves there is nothing wrong with these two traits, but there are times when they work against me. My reserved nature helps keep me from sticking my foot in my mouth...it makes me more apt to think before speaking. On the other hand, it impedes the growth of relationships because I am hard to get to know and can come off as passive or indifferent. My independence also works in this way - it helps me to follow the Lord wherever He may call, but it also tempts me to do things in my own strength. The Lord is ever-so gracious, though, and never leaves us where we are. For this, I am so thankful. Over these past few weeks, He has been reminding me through various trials and situations that He is in control, that I need to trust Him above all else and that His plan is far better than mine. He has called me to ministries that will force me to be less reserved and He wants me to be more open in my relationships. He is breaking my independence by forcing me to rely on and wait on Him in most areas of my life. He has given me things and now He is taking them away so that I will trust Him and not the gifts that He has given. Hard lessons, no doubt, but oh what sweet fruit they will produce!
But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope: The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; His mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. "The Lord is my portion," says my soul, "therefore I will hope in Him." Lamentations 3:21-24

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Sounds like you are mending quite well. I'm happy for you Rachel. =)