Tell Me to Slow Down...

The title of this post is drawn from Third Day's song Slow Down. Lately, I have felt like I cannot keep up with my own pace of life. Ministry, work, relationships and the like are all making demands that I cannot give. Last week was a good week, but it was also a rough one for me spiritually, emotionally and mentally as I have struggled with doubts, fears and feelings of inadequacy. The Lord is so incredibly gracious, though, and met me in my downcast state this morning at Rolling Fields. Today, the message was about Lord's sovereignty. I was reminded to treasure Christ above all things. When I am tempted to sin, shrink back, be lazy in my faith or give up, settle for anything less than Christ or selfishly cling to my life instead of surrendering it to Christ, I need to remember to treasure Christ as Lord (the Sovereign Lord). I have been tempted in each of these ways this past week and gave in to many of them. I wasn't treasuring Christ. Instead, I was believing the lies of the enemy, focusing on my shortcomings, giving into my fears and clinging to my comfort zone and free time. I wasn't focusing on the Sovereign Lord Jesus Christ who is in control of all things and always keeps His promises.

I didn't realize it until today, but I have been under attack from the enemy. I have been doing things that greatly irritate him - sharing the Good News of Christ, seeking to grow closer to Christ and do His will - and, in doing so, have created a spiritual bull's eye on my back. The Lord is allowing me and calling me to be part of some great things He is doing. He allowed me to be a part of someone coming to faith in Christ. He is allowing me to intercede in prayer on behalf of the unbelievers He has placed in my life. He is calling me to surrender my time and step way outside my comfort zone to reach people far from Him through both Rolling Fields and another local ministry. I am once again reminded of my limited wisdom and strength. I can only do these things with His power. Please pray for me as I seek to do His will. I have been especially praying for wisdom and discernment in how to use my time, which believers and unbelievers to invest in the most and what ministry opportunities I should pursue.

How I use my time is an area that the Lord has asked me to surrender to Him. I didn't realize it, but I was clinging to "my" time and was afraid to give it up when considering the above ministries. The Lord reminded me today that it really belongs to Him. He wants me to give up everything for Him, including how I use my time. So, even though it is hard, I am letting go and embracing all that Christ has to offer. I am trading in my fool's gold for immeasurable riches of Christ. "Lord, Your treasure's much better than this fool's gold of mine" (1000 Years by Third Day).

The Lord also reminded me how much I need to rest in Him.

Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28

In order to be fruitful and to endure in ministry, I must spend time with my Savior in order to refuel, be refreshed and become more like Him. I was able to spend the majority of today communing with the Lord through worship at RF, small group, reading His Word, prayer and journaling. He gave me the rest that my spirit was crying for. If I do not spend extended time with the Lord like this regularly, I am going to quickly burn out and give up. Pray that I will be able to guard this precious time with Him. "I'm coming back. I'm turning back to you. You loved me first and now my soul thirsts for You...alone" (I'm Coming Back by Sojourn).

PSALM 16

Preserve me, O God, for in you I take refuge.

I say to the LORD, “You are my Lord;
I have no good apart from you.”

As for the saints in the land, they are the excellent ones,
in whom is all my delight.

The sorrows of those who run after another god shall multiply;
their drink offerings of blood I will not pour out
or take their names on my lips.

The LORD is my chosen portion and my cup;
you hold my lot.
The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places;
indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance.

I bless the LORD who gives me counsel;
in the night also my heart instructs me.
I have set the LORD always before me;
because he is at my right hand, I shall not be shaken.

Therefore my heart is glad, and my whole being rejoices;
my flesh also dwells secure.
For you will not abandon my soul to Sheol,
or let your holy one see corruption.

You make known to me the path of life;
in your presence there is fullness of joy;
at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.

Side note: Exactly a year ago from last Thursday, I left for South Asia.