Wide Open Spaces

Outside it is raining - one of those cool, clean and refreshing rains that almost beckons me to be out in it. A perfect day for cleaning, drinking coffee, listening to music...and blogging.

Last night I had the opportunity to escape the confines of the city and soak up the Great Outdoors at a bonfire about an hour outside of Louisville. There is something about being out in the open, away from the hustle and bustle, that fills my heart with joy. Like the Dixie Chicks song says, I need "wide open spaces." 

This year is nearing the half-way point. It has been a difficult one for sure - filled with spiritual warfare (1 Peter 5:8), the heavy hand of the Lord (Hebrews 12:3-11) and my own inner battle with sin (Romans 7). This year has brought some new experiences that continue to challenge and refine me. The Lord is growing me in many areas and this growth is sometimes very painful and wearisome. He does not leave me alone, however. His grace is sufficient. Intertwined in these difficult lessons have been some been very sweet and precious times in the Word and in ministry. Apart from these past few days, I have not felt like myself for the majority of 2011. My spirit has been downcast; my optimism has faded into pessimism; and my usual smile and laughter (for I dearly love to laugh) has given way to a sort seriousness that has never characterized me before. And the most frustrating part is that I can't really explain why, but, like I said, these past few days have been different. I have been more hopeful, light-hearted and, well, myself. Maybe the clouds over my head have lifted...or maybe the Lord is giving me a small break to catch my breath before the next round of His intense refining work. Either way, He knows what He is doing and it is  for my good and His glory. My hope in all of this is that I will shine brighter for Him.

I think the Lord is leading me to move (yet again). It seems like I move every 6 months to a year...and I hate it. Sometimes I wonder why I even unpack my things. :) When I moved into this apartment last September, I said I was not moving again until either I got married or went overseas. The Lord, however, has other ideas. He has made me very unsettled with where I am now...so it looks like moving is in my near future. My sister (yay!) and I have begun the apartment search. Hopefully, the Lord has one for us in an area that is close to work, school, church and Scarlet Hope. Stay tuned. :)

Lessons from the Lord: patience, endurance, conflict management, hope & trust in the midst of not understanding (for I currently see through a glass dimly - 1 Corinthian 13:12)