Just Embrace It

Time and tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of thirty. Robert Frost

Last Friday, I turned 30. It’s hard to believe that I have been alive for three decades. [What am I doing with my life?] My life looks different than I thought it would at this age. I thought I would be married. I thought I would be overseas. I never imagined that my dad would be gone. But Jesus has planned and established every one of my steps, so I am exactly where He wants me to be. I wouldn’t have it any other way. Indeed, with the psalmist I can say, “The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places” (Psalm 16:6).

Although there are things that have happened in my life that are not good in and of themselves, God’s pronouncement over them is good because He is working in them for my good (Psalm 119:68; Romans 8:28; 2 Corinthians 4:16-18). And He has graciously allowed me to do some pretty incredible things and He still chooses to use me, usually in ways that I don’t even in realize, and I trust and pray that He will continue to do so. Without Christ, my life would look WAY different. I am so thankful that He chose me and saved me and has allowed me to know Him. All true joy and peace and satisfaction are found in Him. I realize that more and more with each passing year.

It’s been my experience that most people who turn 30 hate it. They get depressed or they freak out or they dread it. But to me it’s just another birthday. I’ve decided to embrace it. I mean, I don’t feel 30 and I don’t look 30, judging by the number of people who think I am in my late teens or early twenties or by the shock on their faces when they find out my real age (though, if I have too many more years like this one I will look my age! ;). Getting older means one glorious truth: I am one year close to my true Home. :)

I usually don’t do anything to celebrate my birthday in any formal way (I haven’t done that since I was 12 or 13) nor do I particularly care about my birthday. It’s usually around or even on Thanksgiving, which is my favorite time of year so that is celebration enough for me. But this year was a milestone birthday so my sister and one of my close friends wanted to make it memorable. It was. The details of it were a surprise, but they made a reservation at The Old Spaghetti Factory in downtown Louisville where we celebrated with some of my dearest friends (and, thankfully, there was no corporate singing of Happy Birthday). It was cool to see the ladies from different areas of my life (Rolling Fields, Scarlet Hope, and SBTS) in one room. Normally those aspects of my life never collide.

Mostly, this birthday has been a reminder to reflect on the Lord's grace and goodness displayed in my life. That in itself is a grace from the Lord as He has been gently reminding me of all that He has done and continues to do. He has done a lot in my heart these last few weeks to restore my hope in Him, particularly in regards to the future. I just want to be used by Christ and consumed with Him (though I lose focus of that at times), and I know that is what He wants too. That is my birthday “wish” this year (and every year).

Overwhelmed - in a good way

I am saying this not because of what He has done and does for me (though He is very amazing in that) or because life is “going my way” right now (because, frankly, it’s not as far as circumstances go), but because Jesus is amazing in His essence, in who He is, in His many perfections. When I asked the Father to give me a fresh vision of Jesus, He didn’t change my circumstances or take the pain away, but instead reminded me of who Jesus is and of all that I have in Him (Ephesians 1:3-14).

Dictionary definition of amazing:  “to overwhelm with surprise or sudden wonder; astonish greatly.”

Everything about Jesus Christ is more than I (we) could ever ask for or imagine (Ephesians 3:20). His goodness is beyond my comprehension. His love His greater than I could dare to hope. His mercy is unfailing and His faithfulness is more sure than the sun’s appearance tomorrow morning. He is full of compassion and mercy, which the Bibles says will never fail (Lamentations 3:22-23). His grace is inexhaustible (thanks to Pastor Andy for that reminder) and sufficient for my every need and beyond (2 Corinthians 12:9).

As the Lord removed the scales from my eyes so I could see Him more clearly, He especially reminded me of these three things: His power, His presence, and His patience. (3 P’s – you like that?) The power of Jesus Christ is unlimited and cannot be thwarted. No one can stay His hand or can call Him into account (Daniel 4:35). He has conquered death and Satan and sin and one day soon His rule will be dominant and visible to all (Isaiah 9:7; Philippians 2:9-11). His very word can dissolve mountains and subdue kingdoms and bring the dead to life. Jesus Christ is the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and End of all things (Romans 11:36; Ephesians 1:16; Revelation 22:13). And He is in control of all things and infuses every single event with purpose and meaning. He has the power to make something out of nothing and bring beauty out of ashes. He is able to make all things to work together for the good of those who love Him (Romans 8:28). With such a God as this, there is no need to fear or worry or be anxious or hopeless…ever.

And, yet, Jesus is very personal. He knows me better than I know myself. In fact, He knew me and chose me before He created time and space and the world we know (Ephesians 1:3-4). He planned every one of my days before there was even one of them (Psalm 139:16). He is near to all who call upon Him (Psalm 145:18). So near, in fact, that He chooses to dwell within them (Ephesians 3:17; Colossians 1:27). His presence is constant; there is no place I can go to escape Him (Psalm 139:7-12). He is intimately and meticulously involved in the details of our lives (no matter how trivial or mundane or horrendous they may seem), working in them His particular purposes (though we cannot always perceive Him) with the goal of drawing us to Himself. In His great mercy and compassion, Jesus meets us in our grief and brokenness and rebellion. He enters our darkness to bring us to light. He walks with us through the valleys and sustains us in the wilderness. What we need is what He is (in His essence): Comforter, Healer, Savior, Guide, Rest, Restorer, Redeemer, Protector, Provider, King, etc. He is the I AM (Exodus 3:14). He is the fullness of all things and from that fullness we, who are believers, receive grace in ever-increasing measure (John 1:16). With such a God as this, we will never be alone or forsaken or in want...ever.

And when we seek Him, when we long to know Him, when we cry out to Him, Jesus reveals Himself to us (Jeremiah 29:13). He is always ready to respond and receive and forgive over and over and over again; no matter how many times we mess up or wander off or forget who He is and what He has done. Jesus is very, very patient (Exodus, 34:6; Isaiah 30:18; 2 Peter 3:9). And in His patience, when I was forgetful of His goodness and ungrateful and losing sight of hope, He reminded me of who He was. He did not treat me as I deserved, but gently led me back to Himself. With such a God as this, we should never be afraid to return to Him or run to Him for help. He will never cast us off...ever.

These meditations are an overflow of two things: an answer to prayer and time in the Word. I had asked God to give me a renewed vision of Christ and He, in His kindness, did so by meeting me very sweetly and most preciously through His Word. God’s Word, the Bible, reveals Jesus to us. It has transforming power to remove strongholds, to open blind or veiled eyes, to soften hardened hearts, to melt away fear, and to bring rest and restoration (Hebrews 4:12). It has this power because the Scriptures are the very words of God, and, therefore, they are life and bring life (John 6:63). God’s Word reveals Jesus to us because Jesus is the Word made flesh (John 1:14). Every single promise of God found in the Bible finds its fulfillment in Jesus Christ (2 Corinthians 1:20).

And all of this is just a taste of what’s to come. One day the glory and knowledge of the Lord will cover the whole earth and all we see Him for who He is (Habakkuk 2:14; 1 John 3:2; Revelation 1:7). There will be no more distractions or confusion or brokenness. It will just be HIM in all of His fulness dwelling in the midst of His people (those who treasure Him now and are longing for His return).

It will be said on that day,
“Behold, this is our God; we have waited for him, that he might save us.
This is the Lord; we have waited for him;
let us be glad and rejoice in his salvation.” Isaiah 25:9